Feb 26

Guiding Your Child to Choose the Right Career Option

An advantage in having your child study in a good school is that the education they get is based on real-life applications. Teachers will relate their lessons to real-life situations so that the children can make the right decisions for themselves at a very young age. Careers will be their biggest decisions soon and having the right general skills for any job is important.

Jacques had been thinking of becoming a chemist. My son is good in mathematics and analysing technical information, an “engineer’s intuition” or “chemist’s intuition” they called it. However, he found the love for substances compelling than mechanical parts.
He told me that his teacher told him a chemist can work in a pharmaceutical plant to create new cures, vaccines, repellents and other helpful medical substances. He added that the teacher also told him he could work as a perfume and fragrances apprentice, or he could actually work in industrial chemistry and discover new formulas.

However, he asked me because I had better judgment. I told him that he should research more on the availability of these jobs. Given the world’s economy today, your work as play is becoming unreachable and you will have to make the right decisions.

In guiding your child to make the right career option, have them remember these three things.

1. Salary
As much as we want to work for our passion, we need compensation to live our daily lives.

2. Growth
You need to grow as an individual and the work has to compensate for a growing responsibility you have with your family

3. Availability
Before making a career decision, it will be wise to look if there are existing opportunities for such. Explaining this part is quite difficult, so I would suggest you explain based on your own career judgement.

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Feb 06

Resolving Sibling Disputes the Fairest Way Possible

Stephanie and Jacques grew up together, but in their earlier years, they always fought for many things. Their father and I, when we were all together, would usually give them both what the other had. So each of them did not fight each other to get what the other had. However, disputes and troubles between siblings will still happen regardless of your efforts.

1. Hear the Side of Each
As a single parent, I often reached out to one of them and listened intently. My husband would usually console the other and listen as well. We both talked about what each party had said. Then we discuss who was right and who was wrong or if both of them were right or wrong.

2. Reward and Punishment
Your children are not animals that you train, but it is important that you know when to reward them and when to punish them. Rewarding one of your children will make the other more envious, but if you could assure them that if they attain the same achievement, they get a reward, the more they become motivated. Punishments speak for themselves, but do not be too harsh or your children will never respect you in the future.

3. Give Them Time
You cannot force your two children to talk to each other. They will need some time and space. Usually, it starts with small sharing accompanied by hesitation. Then the more they interact, the more they become capable of understanding each other. You could urge them to see what the other has done, but you could not force them to make amends; they have to do it on their own for their better learning experience.

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Jan 09

Trust is Important

When I talk to other mothers, they talk about their children and their worries whenever they go to school or when they are with their friends. They are so concerned about the future of their child, which is very healthy for a mother. I too, am very worried about the future of my Jacques and Stephanie, but I know they will do well.

When I’m asked about why I’m not so concerned about my children when they talk about the ideal careers for their kids, I just tell them that my children know better than me what they want in life. They tell me that my children aren’t mature enough.

Indeed, my children are not yet beyond the legal age, but the more I interfere with their choices, the more I limit their chances at experiencing something life-changing. I’d rather have them tell me everything happening in their lives and knowing that I don’t judge them based on their decisions when I give them my two cents than having me plan out their lives for them.

Parents, especially mothers, must realize that their children will eventually leave their homes. They will need the ability to think and decide for themselves, which the children can only develop if they actually make choices for themselves.

In developing this form of maturity, the parent must also mature. Trust is very, very important when parenting. Trust your children, and they will trust you back as long as you teach them the real things they can see in the world when they’re young.

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Dec 02

An Understanding Of One’s Self

Stephanie once told me that she wouldn’t probably have a boyfriend or even marry in the future because of her bad looks and her bad attitude. She told me that during dinner. I actually comforted her, because any parent in my position would do so. I also reminded her that she completely understood herself, and it was not such a bad thing.

I told her that when you understand yourself, you begin to improve yourself. You also gain the capacity to change yourself into something that you possibly want or do not want. A good understanding of yourself ensures that you can become the best person you could be because you look at the mirror to dress yourself.

However, I told her that the possibility of people not liking her is because she is doing something comfortable that other people do not find comfortable as well. I told her this is normal because people are not made the same; each has his or her own preferences and understanding.

Understanding one’s self is an important virtue and her statement tells me that she will find a person who could understand her completely. I told her she has an advantage over people who live their lives not understanding their strengths and weaknesses and not recognizing their limitations.

However, I encouraged her to break her limitations without losing her identity and who she truly is.

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Nov 05

The Example You Leave Your Children

I once heard a story from a fellow parent about her child taking after his own father. At one point, during a bus ride, the child said negative remarks about the transportation industry even without having any knowledge behind the economics surrounding it. The mother was shocked to hear such words come out of her son’s mouth, but she said it was because his father said many remarks watching the television regarding the transportation industry.

A child at a very young age will follow the example set by their parents regardless if it is rational or not. Children below the age of eight are just about to develop their sense of logic and parents will play a great part in showing them what is rationally positive and negative.

Inevitably, parents will leave an example for children to follow. A mother who is very neat at home will likely have their children try to clean up their own mess because they see their parent doing such. A father who thinks carefully of his investments and talks about money will have a son or daughter who also talks about money and thinks twice before spending money.

While science might say these attributes are innate given that parents and children share the same DNA, it is also through psychology that proves children shape themselves through their own environment and through their own influences.

As their parents, we are their biggest influences and we should do our best to set a good example.

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Nov 01

PPI Refunds and How they Boost the UK’s Economy

The Office of National Statistics now completely supports the idea that PPI compensation to customers is greatly improving the UK’s economy as consumer spending mobilizes markets. The ONS estimates that a 13.4% increase in the number of car registrations from late 2012 to early 2013 signifies great market movement in the car industry.

Experts have long theorized that PPI repayments have held back many consumers from spending on more products and services. The ONS did not agree with the theory, but its findings today mark the fact that banks played a big culprit in the slowing of the UK’s economy.

Despite the recession, a household who earns £3000 or more from their mis sold PPI has the power to use the money for investing in certain products, in their local areas. While not enough for a property downpayment, anyone who precisely knows their refund using a free PPI calculator can stabilise their finances and help the economy move.

Economists said that the effect of PPI payouts was more effective than the usual quantitative easing and tax returns and refunds because it delivered the money straight into the household for spending. It was not a carry-over the following year savings, but actual money consumers get to spend.

Anyone who wants to know if they were mis sold PPI by their banks could consult a PPI calculator UK claims companies can provide.

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Sep 02

Mobile Technology, Gaming and Technological Headaches Your Kids Want

I’m a businesswoman with a son and normally, I must stay up to date with technology if I want to do all my tasks quickly. Most of these new mobile devices allow for quick integration of data from one account I’m handling to another. Due to their advanced capability, they fall prey to the wanton lust for entertainment any child has.

My Jacques knows how to use my tablet even if I did not teach him. He watches his favourite cartoons through the Internet. Jacques also know how to download games.

Ah, those games. Sure what he got also entertained me in my idle times. But at one point, the games had to go away for a while.

Jacques was avoiding studying. He was easily distracted when I left him the tablet. If he was not playing, he was talking to his friends. I asked him if he did his homework and he tells me he did, only to find out the next morning that he failed to pass his homework.

Mobile technology is actually convenient. It is just that as a parent, I think it is my responsibility to limit my child’s use of them.

If you look at it, technology is power. I am given the capability to handle all my professional responsibilities quickly. However, if given to the wrong person, it could be very well their undoing.

With this perspective, technological headaches should be viewed with more seriousness rather than just the passive “he’s just a boy/girl being a kid”. Sure kids could learn through experience, but your investments are easily saved if you knew the risks.

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Aug 15

Pornography, the Internet and Modern Parents

UK Prime Minister David Cameron’s proposal of blocking pornography in the Internet is getting widespread protests from many Internet users. Obviously, these people support or consume the smut media, but in an open-minded perspective, the people also understand that freedom of expression and circulation of media is also a public right.


However, for parents, pornography is a big thing. Some young parents are careful to hide their media from their children and some stringent rules could make many situations, especially Internet-related ones, awkward for the two sides.

My two kids access the Internet on a daily basis including me. Most of the time I see them interacting with people in their social media profiles and checking their electronic mail accounts for new promotions or episodes of their favourite series. However, if one or both of them ever accessed pornography and I found out, I would handle it in a very subtle way.

You see, children want to have their own privacy as much as adults want to and given the chance, prying in to their private lives can scar the parent-child relationship forever. So, to subtly bring up the topic as a joke, you could ask them effectively without being too awkward. Of course they would deny it, but later on, they will relent.

For the sake of freedom of expression, there is a better way to handle pornography; allow your kids to consume the media and explain to them what is happening. The more you try to hide the media or avoid explaining the subject, the more the children glorify the aspect and become curious.

This is a better solution. They even teach sex education in schools. But allowing your children to understand that reproduction is natural and pornography is just a form of art, it can lessen their curiosities and be more open to you.


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Jul 23

What Legacy Do You Leave Your Children?

Parents have different legacies they want to leave their children. Wealthier families give their children good inheritance and a good life. Some leave their unfinished business, such as research studies or philosophical plights. Some just leave an imprint of love and sympathy for their children.

I’m also a parent and I have two kids. As a single parent, I take care of my children daily before I leave for my work. I make ends meet and this blog helps me to put my reflections and ideas in order.

By nature, I am an orderly person and I only depend on myself and the people I trust to make things possible. My role as a mother to my children is by guidance, not as protector, but also as a teacher.

A legacy I want my children to have is education. I’m having them the best schools this metro could give them and regardless of cost, this will help them know about their own selves and what they can do in life.

I know that experience accounts greatly for education but both these children are bright. But as a parent, I don’t need to leave them material or any sort of ideological inheritance; all I want is that they will remember me as someone who taught them how to make decisions based on premises and standing by their own choices.

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May 23

The Role of Your Children To You

In early history, most families raised multiple children because they needed help from their children to perform daily chores. Children were raised to help around the farm and to ensure that the entire system of planting, cropping and harvesting, as well as animal maintenance, is performed properly. The world’s parents carried this particular mentality about children on until the modern era.

In modern times, the poor raise their children because they need them to gain support when they grow older. Some children embrace this responsibility owing it to their parents for giving them life. However, this is very unfair to the children themselves.

Having children just so you could use them to support yourself in the future is not parenthood but selfishness. Life is priceless, and to have your children exchange their dreams and aspirations just so they can support you is the most cruellest thing a parent can do to their children.

A parent’s wanting of a child must be because the child is a product of their love and they want to make a life’s dream come true. A parent must realize their dreams on their own, with or without the support of their children. The fact that a child must one day separate from their parents should not only be accepted by the child, but also the parent.

In my opinion, as a mother myself, nobody has the right to decline one of their dreams. In raising my kids, I view that they will one day need to support themselves as I need to support myself.

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